I slipped into the pew taking the usual posture hoping to break through. To slip into the cloud where I can connect with He who is as close as my breath, but so far I can’t feel Him or touch Him. Mary Magdalene the one who anoints, is it you? Saint John Paul II the Great, can you bridge from this world through the “cloud of unknowing” to the next? I again look outward for what is inward because sometimes inward feels so empty. I pray again this time just listening. In the silence in the church I let go and wait, careful not to contrive my thoughts and careful not to be searching like a roving metal detector sweeping for buried treasure in the sand. I want to know what I know is there just behind the veil of my own mind.
Come Holy Spirit fill the mind of your faithless one, the one who tries maybe too hard while at the same time trusts too little. One who is undeserving none the less hopes for your quickening touch.